Playgroup Politics

I am SOOOO not into this! That is why, more than a year and a half ago, the kids and I quit going to our weekly playgroup and haven't really joined one since. It is great to get together to let the kids play and learn their social skills and just have a good time. That is the most important thing and the overall point of having a playgroup, is it not? It is a perk when the moms can become friends, too, and can be a support system for each other, but the high pressure stuff is just not worth it to me.

I sometimes have a tendency to question myself and the decisions I make (are they really for the best?), and quite honestly, I give people the benefit of the doubt more often than I probably should because I want to see the good in others. Over the past several years, though, I have come to terms with the fact that I am a pretty good judge of character, and, overall, I really haven't made many truly bad decisions in my life, so I need not doubt myself. When I began to feel like the playgroup thing we were doing wasn't in our best interest, I decided that I had to be consistent for the sake of my kids and either keep going regularly despite my misgivings or we needed to stop going altogether so we could make room for something better, and you know which one I chose. Luckily, neither of my kids was at the age where they were formulating solid friendships yet. For pete sake, Ashley wasn't even eating solid foods yet, and Zachary still wanted to do exactly the opposite of what the other kids were doing. The names of these "friends" really didn't register with him as being of any importance, so I took that as a cue that it wasn't going to devastate him. It never did, and I have never regretted the decision, either.

It just so happened that we ran into one of those other playgroup moms and her kids today while we were out playing. She saw me across the way and waved to me, and I didn't even recognize her at first. We hadn't even had the chance to get to know each other very well before the kids and I stopped going, but, ironically, the last time we saw them was at her son's birthday party. She came over and sat down next to me while the kids played together, and it was more than a little awkward at first. I mean, what do you say in that situation? Well, I'm not living in the past and wasn't holding any grudges, so I just tried to make friendly conversation with her and avoided the topic of the playgroup altogether until she finally brought it up herself. And if ever I questioned whether I had made the right decision way back when, I certainly don't anymore. It was no coincidence, but still I was somewhat surprised to learn, that just about every mom in the group had fallen away one-by-one after I left...and for many of the same reasons I had. It was one of those moments of supreme validation. It is nice to know that my radars work just fine, and it is equally nice to know that we could have a good time with our old friends today without the politics of playgroups getting in the way.