"Easter Beagle Eggs"

It was fun getting ready for Easter today. For some reason, Zachary and Ashley weren't interested in watching, "It's the Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown" this year as they have every year (and not necessarily only at Easter time) since Zachary was about a year old. Instead they watched "It's Christmastime Again, Charlie Brown"...TWICE. Crazy kids... After dinner, we dyed eggs..."Easter Beagle Eggs" as they have come to be affectionately termed. But have no fear, we didn't waffle them. We didn't toast them. We didn't fry them, and we didn't turn them into egg soup. We BOILED them!!! ;)

Go Fish!

I've never been a huge fan of Goldfish, but my kids seem to like them. Then we discovered new Flavor-Blasted Goldfish, and boy are those tasty! So, the last time I saw them on sale at Target, I decided we should try out several of the different flavors. My pantry is stocked with 3 packages, only one of which was opened. The other day, Ashley brought me an unopened (green) package of Ranch-flavored Goldfish and wanted some for a snack. Not wanting to have 3 opened packages at one time, I went in search of the already-opened package which was nowhere to be found.

Me: "Chris, did you finish off the Mozzarella Goldfish?"
Chris: "No. Did YOU finish off the Mozzarella Goldfish?!"
Me: "No. I just wondered why they're missing all of a sudden if nobody has eaten them."

Ashley was sitting at the table when Chris, strangely inspired, opened the trash can and pulled out the half-full (golden-colored) package of Mozzarella Goldfish.

Chris: "You mean THESE?!"
Ashley: "NOOOOOO! I WANT GREEN!"

Hmmmm....I just WONDER how THOSE got THERE!?

That's Some Powerful Juice!

Did you know that one of the amazing yet lesser known benefits of drinking Sunny Delight is that it helps you swim and surf? No? Neither did I! That is, until tonight. Zachary brought this to my attention. Wow!

"What I Meant to Say..."

Last night, during Family Home Evening, Chris read the kids a story about a little boy who was going off to school for the first time and was so excited about learning. Just as the boy in the story was asked to do by his teacher, Chris asked Zachary to say his name and something about himself. Zachary said, "My name's Zachary, and I like blocks and shapes. I like circles, I like triangles, and I EVEN LOVE SQUIRRELS!" Ooops, I think that came out a little wrong! And I think Zachary knew it, because he was laughing as hard as the rest of us.

Mommy's Little Helper vs. Mommy's Little Helps-Himself

This morning, I awoke to hear the following conversation between my kids, who were cheerfully discussing the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches they wanted for breakfast:

Zachary: "Ashley, bring me a chair so I can get the bread from on top of the refrigerator."
Ashley: "I don't think so. Mommy can help."
Zachary: "Then I'm going to climb on the treadmill and then on the counter so I can get it."
Ashley: "No. Mommy can help."

And that's about the point when I got up, walked into the kitchen and calmly suggested, "Yes, Mommy can help."

I Can See How She Might Be a Little Confused...

My dad has developed an interest in woodworking and also likes whimsical characters, so I think that's why my mom bought this statuette for him last Christmas. Right now, it sits on a small table in their living room for all to see. Ashley (age 2 1/2) saw it one day and asked, "Whistle?" My mom corrected her and said, "That's a flute!" And with all the innocence of a little child, Ashley asked, "Heavenly Father plays the flute?!"

*Not that it changes the point of the story, but I found out today that this is NOT an exact replica of the statue on display in my parents' home. The one they have is definitely more stylish...as stylish as a gnome statue can be, anyway.*

To Say That I Was Sufficiently Warned...

I was trying to think of what to make for dinner tonight, and I admit I was being awfully slothful about it. Chris was taking a snooze on the couch, and the kids, who really should have been starving, were happily playing together in their room. I felt no pressure.

A little while later, I managed to get the kids to emerge from their room and I began probing them for some easy dinner ideas since, clearly, nobody seemed to really care WHAT I made. I asked the kids if they would like corndogs. The only problem with corndogs, or so I thought, was that Ashley will only eat the breading part. And on a day like today, if all she wants to eat is corndog breading, well, so be it.

Zachary piped up, "I want to eat a frozen corndog!"

Well, I have heard this a number of times before, and I have always been opposed to the idea. I'd kind of think that CPS might rightfully be called if I knowingly fed my kids frozen meals without preheating them first. I would never do such a thing, because I do *try* to be a good mother...even on my lazy days (like today.)

I speak only for myself when I say that I was doing what any lazy mother ought to be doing and was checking out Facebook instead of making dinner for my family at 7pm. So, it was no surprise when I heard my kids scrounging around in the kitchen for something to eat. I wasn't going to be on the computer for much longer, and kids in the kitchen (at least at MY house) always warrants an inspection and a quick one. That was going to put a hasty end to checking out my friends' status updates.

Just a few minutes earlier, the kids had been asking for Pillsbury Toaster Strudels for dinner...or in Ashley's own words, "Toaster Noodles." I had rejected that proposal, so when I heard the opening of refrigerator/freezer doors in the other room, I figured they might just be helping themselves to those anyway...or maybe they were after the tub of Cool Whip in the fridge. I knew it wasn't the parmesan cheese they were getting into, because I recently placed that on the list of "Foods That Are No Longer Welcome In My House" after the fourth container (in about 6 months' time) was emptied onto the table and eaten fingerful by fingerful. I wouldn't have been surprised if they were munching on chocolate chip cookies. After all, there was a tray of those sitting out unattended on top of the stove. But no...

What should I find when I emerged from my momentary Facebook stupor but Ashley with a corndog in each hand, frozen ones of course, with polk-a-dot-sized pieces of breading missing from each of them. In the kitchen, Zachary sat at the table with 3 frozen corndogs in front of him--two of them already half-eaten and the third one mostly unscathed. After initially being grossed-out, I wrestled the corndogs away and popped them all into the microwave and, voila!, "It's what's for dinner."

So today wasn't a stellar day for me in the balanced meal department. In my own defense, however, this is definitely not typical, so please don't call CPS. (After giving it some thought, I really wasn't very lazy today, either, because I got a lot of cleaning done.) You win some, and you lose some. But just where my kids get their crazy appetites, I think I will never know!

My Kids Converse About Christmas Clothing

Last night, after enjoying a meal with their grandparents, my kids wanted to go back to their house. But it was late, so I was taking them straight home to go to bed. I told them that we would see Grandma and Grandpa another day. In fact, I told them, we would see them at church on Sunday since they would be attending Zachary's first Primary program.

Ashley responded, "O-kay, I wear my pwincess dwess! O-kay Mommy?"

I told her that her that, yes, she could certainly wear her princess dress (which actually is her Christmas dress from Grandma--not some sort of Disney get-up) and that Grandma would think she looked beautiful.

Zachary replied, "And I will wear my Christmas shoot!" (That would be his Christmas SUIT.) Unexpectedly, he continued. "And I will bring my guns and shoot all the bad police guys at church."

Ashley, knowing exactly what her brother would be wearing, said, "No, Zachary, you be a PWINCE!"

Jesus is my Autopilot?

After ignoring Ashley's pleas for me to put on It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, I reluctantly accepted the fact that my nap on the couch was over. I might as well let her watch it since continuing to endure her climbing all over me was not the better option. So, I put the DVD in the player and went into the kitchen to check on some brownies that were in the oven. I washed some raspberries and returned to my spot on the couch. Zachary and I were enjoying the raspberries when the DVD stopped on the menu screen. Both kids began a little chant for me to go start the movie for them. My mouth was a little full at the time, but I told Zachary to go press "play"...only it sounded more like, "Pless play!" They thought I had said, "Let's pray," and before I knew what was going on, both kids bowed their heads, folded their arms, and began, "Dear Heav'y Fodder...Jesus Cwist...Amen!"

See? They ARE learning!

Silly Mommy, Clips are for Kids!

(Zachary decided to experiment with his sister's hair last week. I pulled out 18 of these tiny clips, and you can see there are only about 6 in the front. I can't believe she let him do that to her!)

Quick Change

Ashley has surprised us by learning a new trick. Last night, when I went in to make sure the kids' CD player was turned off before we went to bed, I discovered a peculiar present left on the floor. No, not THAT kind of present. Well, not exactly anyway. There, in the middle of the floor, was her (slightly wet) diaper...just sitting there waiting to be disposed of properly. Expecting to find her pants-less in the crib with wet sheets, I was merely annoyed by Ashley's initiative. But to find that she had removed her wet diaper and then REPLACED her pants all by herself while staying DRY...well, I couldn't have been more proud of this "first" for her. And, now, I guess she's mastered this new skill overnight because I made the same discovery this morning. Funny girl! (Let's just hope that she likes the dirty ones enough to keep them on!)

Chocoholics Anonymous, Here We Come!

You may remember an incident that happened a couple of months ago in which I caught Zachary in the act of filching hot fudge from the bottle with his finger. If only it was an isolated incident! Now we have TWO children who have been caught countless times consuming chocolate conspicuously from containers. Perhaps this pattern is beginning to pose a problem? (Aaaaaaagh! I know... Enough with the alliteration already!)

So, last week, I found Zachary seated at the kitchen table with one of his squiggly straws inserted into the hot fudge container, and he was just merrily sucking away like...like perhaps this was premeditated! Aside from his ingeniousness to use the straw on his second attempt, having previously learned his lesson the hard way while trying his original method of manual extraction, a squiggly straw wasn't exactly the most brilliant choice of tools. I didn't think to tell him that using a squiggly straw to suck hot fudge from the container was certainly doing the deed in a roundabout way. Personally, I would have opted for just a plain ol' straight straw, or I might have just skipped the straw altogether, but that's just me and I'm NOT the one here with a problem. He seemed to have been somewhat successful, as I do remember his face bearing plenty of hard evidence, but the fudge had only filled the straw halfway. I guess I saved him from several more minutes of some serious sucking!

This week, on Wednesday, the kids and I spent the afternoon swimming with Grandma at her neighborhood pool. Afterwards, we went back to the house and enjoyed some frozen yogurt. Then, she and I ventured back into the living room to visit some more. As I recall, Zachary was playing nearby while Ashley disappeared and later emerged as such:



The Hershey's syrup had been left on the counter, and leave it to Ashley to get her hands on that! After allowing her ample opportunity to ingest it for awhile longer while I snapped a few shots for the sake of sharing, I retrieved the bottle from her and set it aside and, apparently, forgot all about it. I didn't even realize it had been forgotten until the next day when my mom told me that my dad had found the bottle EMPTY in the other room and had asked about it. Suddenly, Mom solved the problem that had been puzzling me since the night before: Why was Zachary awake until ONE A.M.??? Now we know: Caffeine consumption from the chocolate syrup, of course!

When Playtime Gets A Little Twisted

Zachary and Ashley are having a heyday with some new toys they acquired yesterday for their birthdays courtesy of Aunt Steven and Uncle Amanda. (Don't ask me why, but I always mix their names up like that!) Anyway, Ashley got a new cradle for her dolly and Zachary got a set of power tools for his "workshop". (I think he thinks he will actually be building something with these tools, and today when I asked him what he plans to build, he said he's going to build a car. I think this is great since we could use a bigger car to haul more of our stuff around.)

Zachary and Ashley are like 2 peas in a pod sometimes...the best of friends, usually. And today they were playing so nicely together and sharing their toys so well. Occasionally, Ashley would get mildly irritated that Zachary had the screwdriver she wanted or that he was pounding the plastic nails into the plastic wood all wrong. So, instead of listening to her not-so-mild tantrums about Zachary taking HER tools away from her (She's 2--EVERYTHING is hers), I made Ashley his "Assistant Tool Girl." And there was peace in the land. (For some reason, giving Ashley a title always seems to make life so much easier. Previously, she informed me that "Queen" would be a good one.) It is safe to say that both kids love the tools. And a little later, when I broke out the new dolly accessories and put together the cradle, Zachary was suddenly fond of dolls, too! Imagine that!

So, for quite awhile, my 2 children played harmoniously together with the dolly, then the tools, and then they pulled out the doctor's kit. Not that my kids have scared me yet while playing doctor or anything, but I was curious to listen in while they examined the dolly. Her diagnosis was a broken leg. Ouch. I asked Zachary how the dolly got the broken leg, half-expecting him to concoct some unlikely story about the dolly's mother dropping the dolly after her bath, but he was simply unsure of how it happened. (Yeah right! Try telling THAT to the ER nurse.) So anyway, Zachary requested that I be there to assist with the fixing of the broken leg. All it takes, he said, is an "Owie-Aid" and the "Plunger". (That would be a Band-Aid and the syringe thingy used to give shots.) And, voila, the baby is all better and is resting comfortably again in her new cradle.

What compassionate children I have who would so lovingly care for their wounded playmate that way, I think to myself...and then, suddenly, Zachary pulls out his electric saw and declares, "AND HERE ARE SOME WONDERFUL TOOLS TO SCARE HER!"

OK, now you guys are scaring ME!


Little bundle of joy...
...feeling much better!

And here's my boy:
Is it just me, or is he holding that saw just like a shotgun?

What Part of "NO"...?

Zachary: "Mommy, can we play the shadow game?" (Shadows Over Camelot = fairly complicated adult game with an excess of small pieces.)
Me: "No, Zachary."
Zachary: (jubilantly) "Okay!!!"
Me: "Um, that was a no."
Zachary: "But THAT was a YES!"

Double Trouble

I love the way little children (particularly 3 year-olds) pick up expressions from adults and then turn around and try to use them to express their own emotions. They often come out sounding more comical than anything else. For example, last year Zachary picked up the phrase "Give me a break!" Only when something happened that made him just a little mad, he'd exclaim, "Gimme anudder break!" Well, yesterday, he and Ashley were in the kitchen eating at the table and I was in the other room working on something for a moment. I could tell that something Ashley was doing was bothering her brother immensely. Suddenly, in a heated tone of voice, Zachary tried to stop her behavior and yelled out, "ASHLEY! GIVE ME ANUDDER SISTER!" I'm not quite sure what he meant by that, but somehow I don't believe that having TWO sisters would have made the situation any easier to deal with. Not for me anyway!

Ohhhhh, Fudddddge!

Is it selfish or neglectful of me to disappear for, say, an hour to go take a shower and do my hair while my kids watch cartoons? (I mean, they've been properly fed, bathed--with fruity-scented bubbles and everything, plenty of playtime included--and dressed before this point, so it's not like I don't at least TRY to put their needs ahead of my own. Oh, and trust me, they're not crying when I make them watch cartoons or play with their toys, either.) Just wondering if I am the only person for whom it takes THAT LONG to get ready for the day. I'm really not one of those people who can chop it all off or just wash-n-go. Believe me, I wish I was!

That being said, I admit that occasionally (like pretty often) things happen while I'm in the bathroom blowdrying my hair. If I wasn't keen enough to expect it now, I'd be unaware of my children's escapades until the blowdryer was turned off and I could hear again. Most of the time, these things happen in the kitchen, very often with Zachary and Ashley sandwiched between the refrigerator and the refrigerator door. Those little rascals! You would think I never feed them! (Of course, I think they do it as much to satisfy their curiosity about things I don't normally let them have--like lime juice, for example--as they do it to get into the good stuff.)

Today, I detected such a silence that made me suspicious. Before I could even get up to go check on them, Ashley wandered into the bathroom to find me, being followed by her whimpering big brother. I was prepared with kisses for any "owies" but then I heard him say that he was "stuck." That can be kind of a scary thought, right? Well, as it turned out, Zachary had raided the fridge and was helping himself to a treat when his finger got stuck...in the bottle of hot fudge. Very distressing indeed!







Stuck?






Stuck?!






STUCCCK!!!






Ahhhhhhhh! Sweet release.

Space Invaders

Last week, Zachary and Ashley found a very entertaining use for my closet. (Come over and see for yourself if you must.) And what's more fun than playing in a closet? Playing in a clean one, of course! (Much too dangerous otherwise.) Just couldn't let all those smiles get away.

Revelation

This morning, two hours earlier than my kids normally get up, I awoke to the sounds of Zachary sobbing in his room. I dragged myself out of bed and went to go check on him and asked if he'd had a bad dream, to which he just said, "I neeeeeed wooo!" I gave him a hug to comfort him, and then guess who should also start "crying". It was a pathetic little fake cry, because Ashley has to do everything that Zachary does. So, I got her out of her crib to offer some "fake" comfort to her (just kidding!) and then everyone was fine again. Suddenly, in a moment of sheer enlightenment, Zachary looked at Ashley, the two of them sitting happily side-by-side with their legs dangling over the side of the bed, and he exclaimed, "Hey! We're KIDS!!!" With that epiphany, my world is suddenly starting to make more sense to me!

(And, content with that simple explanation for why I had to sacrifice TWO FULL HOURS of sleep, I sent the kids on a hunt to find all of their warm, fuzzy blankets and then asked them to pile them all on top of me until I couldn't see (or breathe) anymore. It worked! I got another minute or two of much-needed sleep.)